why not

We spend most of our lives obeying rules and meeting expectations, don't we? Wake up at this time, wear this outfit, do your homework, aim for an A on your test, punch in to work at this time, do your work, do your work well, do your work exceptionally well so you stand out, pay your bills, pay your bills on time, eat this, not that. And so on...

All these rules and expectations that I've been used to for all these years. Structure. Stability. Definition of self. What do you do when that all goes away? What do you do when you realize you need to change and grow and then it actually happens...Well first comes anxiety and fear, then depression, then well... liberation.

So before I jinx any of these new feelings, I am dying my hair a honey blonde ( always wanted to, but never thought it would be "appropriate"), taking a photography class(who cares if I don't get a job out of it, it's my passion), looking into teaching myself piano(never mastered an instrument and it sounds so pretty) and training for my first 5k(because you need to challenge your body).

This is the first time in a long long time, probably since I was a child, where I did what I truly wanted. It's the first time where I've had the opportunity to explore my "wants" rather than meet my needs.

It's taken a while to get here and I've gone through some ridiculous obstacles and heartbreak, but I am exactly where I should be, in this state, in the arms of a fantastic man, writing this blog. But first things first....I'm going blonde! Next Tuesday at 2:45 to be exact...keep you posted

Cheers!